Wednesday, 24 June 2015

What would I tell my younger self....

This is actually a difficult question and one that I have been thinking about for weeks now. It is difficult as if it was possible  you would have to be careful not to give too much information that you would stop yourself from living but enough information that could make life easier and safer.

Over 25 years living with T1D I have done some stupid stuff and I am now doing things that I am very proud of and they are the type of things I wish I could have done right from the start.
  • I have not tested for days on end through my teens,
  • I have gone out on binges with no one around knowing the dangers of what it could mean if I were to have a severe low or high while passed out,
  • I have argued and not listened to family and doctors when in hindsight I know they were trying to make sure I was doing all the right things,
  • I have never missed an injection. Even though I didn't test I knew that insulin was my saviour,
  • I started writing this blog. Even though it is only my thoughts on a page and the details of a life so far with T1D it has allowed me to reflect on what it actually means to have T1D and how things continually change,
  • I haven't been afraid to do what I have wanted to do,
  • I have seen GP's and specialists come and go. All of which had their own ideas on what would be best and to tell you the truth not many of them have asked what I think (must be because I only lived this disease rather than study it for a few years)
  • I have started a family with the na├»ve thought that since I was the only one in my family to ever have T1D then I would hold that to myself and no one else would have to bare the responsibility that this disease forces on you
  • I have begun to try and teach my youngest daughter, who developed T1D in 2013, that T1D is going to be with her for a long time and even though she doesn't know why we do the things we do we do them for her benefit and out of the most loving part of our heart
  • I have finally realized that even though there are more communication methods in which we can all use living with T1D can still be a very lonely disease to live with
  • I have seen that I am not the only one living the injections, calculations, fear and happiness day in day out. We are still a minority in a very large world however we are not alone
  • I have struggled to get medication  and supplies having to sacrifice other things to ensure that the things that keep us alive are available
  • I have been lucky that I finally found a Endo who understood me and put me on the path to pumping. Something that I will never regret
  • I have the joy of being an Ambassador for a world leading company who is making life easier and safer for all T1D's willing to make a change and have a little device attached to them 24x7. It really is the smallest of concerns when you see the benefit to living that it gives
  • I have been able to tell my story to small groups and to large groups all in the hope that I am able to help educate people that there are different types of Diabetes and it isn't just a case of not eating sugar
  • I have a pump and technology now that will not only deliver the life saving hormone that my immune system sort out and destroyed but it also has the smarts to be able save my life. If you don't know what I am talking about it is the Medtronic 640g with Smartguard.

I suppose this list could go on forever however when looking back I think I would tell my younger self to be who I am but to respect T1D. It is something that will be a part of you for the rest of your life and as much as you have days where it will take centre stage it is something that you learn to live around and it shouldn't stop you from doing what you need and want to do. Oh and get into helping others realize that their not alone a lot earlier than I have.